There is a really interesting phenomenon that happens when deep healing is afoot — I’ve seen this in my own life, and with my clients: as we begin to expose our deep wounds to the air and really get relief from what has felt impossibly heave, maybe even for the first time, there’s all this beauty and space that opens up in our hearts and lives — but right alongside that, comes grief. Wildly surprising grief that show up in unexpected ways and with unpredictable timing. As a somatic healing practitioner, then, I’ve found that my work is to only help people unravel the emotional calcifications relational trauma leaves in its wake, but also somatic healing asks that we learn how to grieve well.
A few months ago, I sat down with Jeannette LeBlanc, she’s the author of, “You Are Not Too Much: Love Notes on Heartache, Redemption & Reclamation.” Jeannette is one of my dearest friends, and as we hit record, she reminded me of a text I sent her about how even (and especially) when beautiful, transformative love shows up in our lives, so does grief. We talk about how when we have the capacity feel and acknowledge the wisdom of grief, it can actually open up other pathways to levity and pleasure.
We also talk cycles of healing, and how important it is to notice what’s not present as much as we notice what is. I loved this conversation, because for years now, Jeannette and I have been having really illuminating conversations about attachment theory and creating a shared language of love and healing, and we often come out of those conversations saying, “Dude, we should have been recording that.”
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Until next time, lovers.